Bad Mom? More Like Nope Mom
by reddoggie
Summary: In the storm of chaos to which Molly says no f's given and looks for the wine. Later she explains to her kids, "Mama said what the FOX; it's an expression meaning…" OOC-ness/crack/drama/comedy? Rated T for swearing


Disclaimer: 'Course I don't own anything. Nope.

Bad mom: In the storm of chaos to which Molly says no f's given and looks for the wine. Later she explains to her kids "Mama said what the FOX; it's an expression meaning…" OOC-ness/crack/drama/comedy?

(It was hard to find the balance between like laid back bad mom, and loving mom.)

Children's ages: Gin:5 Ron:6 Twins:8 Perce:10 Charlie:13 Bill:14 (I just made up some ages and don't even mention them… oh well)

* * *

Molly likes to think she's a wonderful mother. She wants to be the perfect mother, of course, doesn't every mom want to? Then again right now, she's not feeling it. Meh.

Very rarely does Molly just feel like enough is enough. Today, she thinks is one of those days as the picturesque scene of chaos enfolds before her. The twins are heckling Charlie and Bill to show them some magic. Most likely they will again try performing some underage magic. Molly can feel the migraine forming from the lecture those two are should be getting. Percy is attempting to read some of his school books before his first year even begins. All the loud noise must be hard to concentrate she notes. On the floor Ron and Ginny seem like they're playing an imaginary game. The two look like they're having a disagreement about something from the yelling she hears.

Almost in her head Molly can count down when the metaphorical shit is about to hit the fan and the children will go nuclear: 3. 2. 1.

Boom.

"Fred, George, I am not going to show you any spells close to an explosion that you're looking for! God knows, I wasn't born yesterday. Quit trying to blow things up!" Charlies yells at the twins tired of being bugged every minute by them when he and Bill say, 'No, we're not teaching the twins any fire or explodey magic because of, duh, they will do something stupid.' The twins whine louder.

"Oh my god can you guys keep it quiet! I'm trying to study here." Percy snaps after having attempted reading the same page for the last ten minutes.

"Aw, does Percy the bookworm need _more_ studying?" The twins tease.

"Roooooooon!" Young Ginny screeches when Ron has consistently replied 'no' to her continuous 'yeses'.

All this infighting has the children to seek an outside source that can settle everything once and for all. Almost like a choir, they all shout at once "MOOOOOM!" yet seemingly without the melodic voices. So not like a choir at all.

Seven pairs of eyes turn to Molly. She can feel a dull thud in her head.

Ahhhhh, Molly could really go for a glass of cold sweet tea. Wine would be better. She would actually rather pretend these monsters aren't hers and sit back just watching. No these aren't hers, yes they do look like her, but it's only a coincidence. Red heads are _way_ common.

"Ummmm… I think I left my bathroom sink on! Heheheh, better go check it." Pretty unconvincingly Molly says and dashes upstairs.

"Um, Mom just totally ran away right?"

"Yeah, I think so."

Upstairs:

"Quick gotta find my emergency wine case!" Molly mutters while rummaging through so much crap in her closet. She specifically labeled it as 'juice for adults only'. She swears if she finds an empty canister only rained upon hellfire will satisfy her. Of course she jinxes herself.

Downstairs:

"Do you think Mom went to go drink some of her emergency juice in her room?"

"And why would you know anything about that George?"

"Because we have tried some of it but it tasted weird, so we dumped it out."

"Oh my god. We're all going to die you _idiot_!"

Suddenly a loud yell of a woman's voice can be made out. "What the FUUUUUCK!"

Loud stomping is heard as Molly thunders down the stairs. The children know hell is about is come.

As Molly reaches the last step she inspects each child's face to see who looks the guiltiest, but upon seeing the deep fearful looks in her children's eyes, Molly lets her anger go. She has gone from tired, nope not dealing with it, to anger, to back again, nope she's not dealing with this.

In a resigned voice Molly says, "Alright, who touched the juice upstairs?"

All the Weasley children are quick to rat out George and Fred pointing and glaring at them. "Umm, it was an accident?" George pitifully says.

"Not good enough, when you damage something that isn't yours when it specifically says 'Do not touch', you need to come forward immediately and tell the person. Then that person will decide how you can repay them back. For now, just go get mama another wine case, kay?" Sevens pairs of eyes look at her incredulously.

"Oh please, as your mother I know how crafty you two are. Just go snatch bottles some from the Wilson's down the road. Then all is forgiven."

*One stolen wine bottle later*

Molly can't help but whistle. "Daaaayum. This is some high quality stuff. Good. Now no more stealing from the neighbors unless I say so."

Now that their mom is almost back to normal, Ron and Ginny want to know what 'fuc' means.

With a nervous laugh Molly replies, "Dear sweet Ginny and Ronnie, mama said FOX, f-o-x. The phrase 'what the fox' means…"

* * *

And back to normal Molly I guess, somewhat. I wrote this for myself and it was a funny concept but then got out of hand. Was this funny? I know they're all out of character but yeah.

Please leave a review, please. Oh. I already said it. Hehehe, I don't know why the only HP fics I write are Molly-based. I have another fic I've been working on where its drama and family loving Molly. Who knows if I'll ever finish it, but I like that one more. ;D (Yay I learned how to add a line break?)


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